i thought that when i let you back into my life, you would understand what changes you had to make to keep me there. yesterday was so fun after school, when it was just us and jessica, and then everything turned into the old routine again. sitting on your bed for hours, sitting in the car for hours, having to listen to things you know i hate talking about with you. but it gets better, because you have the decency to invite him over once again, which i thought you understood upset me because i want to be with JUST my best friend. i thought i could give you another chance. i actually thought you could change slightly.
you know i don't like being around you two, even though there were others with us... two.
it sounds stupid to anyone reading, obviously. "she doesn't like when her best friend and boyfriend are together, how immature", is probably circling your mind right now. i know i'm right.
but if you've been there, if you are one of my closest friends, you could understand in a heartbeat. being constantly left out, and replaced completely by your own best friend is not what i expected when i started this. if she wonders why i don't hang out with her anymore, she should know the exact reason, but she doesn't even get it.
if you see me around school with my close friends, and you assume i've changed, then i'm sorry. because quite frankly, you've changed too. you are exactly like him. and every time is see those traits come out, i can't help but get a reminder of why i stopped hanging out with you in the first place.
i told you several times yesterday how much you've changed from the person i used to be friends with. how you're not spontaneous anymore. how you're not sam. and you seem to think it's for the better. but honestly, it isn't. because now you don't have that best friend figure which you did before. or maybe you do? his name is david.
so thanks for all of the lovely memories, and it was fun. i tried to start over with you, and it failed. i've moved on, and i've been moved on for a while now. i have a handful of amazing friends who completely understand where i'm coming from, because they see it too. so have fun with him, and only him. because i have a lot more than i did a while back, and i am actually so happy now. so we can go back to being acquaintances at school now.
and you don't have to worry about balancing him and me out, so you must be happy.